I’m hesitant to even write this post, lest you think I’m some sort of “Baby Whisperer” who has all the answers about babies and sleeping, or lest you hate me because your six-month-old still isn’t sleeping through the night. I don’t write this from a prideful perspective (“Look at me and my awesome sleeping babies!”), but from a place of humility and a desire to share what I’ve learned in the hopes that it may help someone else. I’ve learned everything I know about sleeping babies from other wise people and from a little trial and error. Some of this information is the Babywise method, but I’m really not that strict or scheduled for the most part (I’ve never actually read the book).
I want to share the knowledge I’ve learned (however small) with you!
I don’t have all the answers. I have just learned some helpful strategies that have worked for our family and may work for yours. These strategies might not work for your family and babies… but they just might. And some of them may even help tonight!
*Throughout this post I frequently refer to nursing my baby, but if you’re bottle-feeding yours, this post is for you too. Not everyone can (or chooses to) breastfeed, and you’re still an awesome mom however you nourish your precious baby.
10 Tips for Establishing a Newborn Sleep Routine
Pray
First of all, God cares about you and your little one(s), so make every aspect of their lives a matter of prayer. God is the giver of all wisdom, and He delights to reveal Himself to us! Be honest in your struggles, your failings, and your concerns. He has always been so faithful to help me and to give me strength in difficult seasons!
Understand growth spurts and cognitive leaps
It’s important to understand that your baby will go through several growth spurts and cognitive leaps in his first few years of life. These occur more frequently in the first year, and they are marked by increased wakefulness/fussiness and a desire to eat, be soothed, and be held more frequently. If I notice an uptick in these signs, I check Kelly Mom to see if it’s time for a growth spurt. I also like the app called The Wonder Weeks, which tracks cognitive leaps and, so far, has been exactly on target for Jude. This app is helpful for showing why your baby is fussy… because he or she is on the brink of a new development! Understanding growth spurts and leaps helps you know you’re not doing anything wrong (“She is eating all the time!”) and helps you know that this is just a short season that will pass quickly.
Breastfeed on demand during the day
I know this isn’t how everyone chooses to do things, but I have always, always nursed my babies on demand during the day. If they’re hungry, I nurse them. If they just ate but seem interested again, I nurse them. If they just want to be cuddled and pacified, I also nurse them. It’s especially important not to stick to an arbitrary schedule (i.e. every three hours) when your baby is first born if you are nursing and are trying to establish a good milk supply. They will eventually stretch out daytime feedings to every 2-3 hours, but at the beginning, it’s important to feed them a lot.
Follow the cycle of eat, wake, sleep
Credit where credit is due: this is one of the biggest points of Babywise. Getting into a pattern is good, and eat, wake, sleep is a great cycle for your baby. When he wakes up, feed him right away. Let him have some awake time (playing with him, letting him have tummy time, reading to him, etc.), and then put him down while he is still awake but before he becomes overtired. You’ll start to “learn” your baby and know when he is looking drowsy and is ready for a nap. So much of being a mom is learning to know your child (each one will be different)!
Put baby down in the crib for a nap at least once a day (aim for at least 3 good naps a day)
As much as I adore letting my baby fall asleep on my chest (there is nothing sweeter!), I have tried to help him get acclimated to his crib from an early age. My baby (7 weeks) currently takes a 1.5-2 hour morning nap, a 2-2.5 hour afternoon nap, and a 2-2.5 hour evening nap. He sleeps in his crib for these naps now, but early on he spent some of the naps (much shorter ones throughout the day) in my arms. You’ll have to figure out a schedule that works (I’ve loosely planned his naps around my other two children’s sleeping schedules) for your baby and your family. By letting him sleep in his crib, he’s learning to fall asleep on his own and fall back asleep if he wakes up during the nap.
Put baby to sleep awake
I don’t rock my baby to sleep and then carefully place him in his crib, tiptoeing out of the room so he doesn’t wake up. Instead, I lay him down in his crib while he is still awake (but definitely very sleepy) and let him drift off on his own. I haven’t had to let Jude “cry it out” (cry himself to sleep) because I’ve been doing this method since he was born. With my oldest, I didn’t start doing this until around 3 months, so we did have to let her cry some so that she could learn to put herself to sleep.
Don’t let naptimes go too long
It’s tempting to “let sleeping babies lie,” but if you want to have a good stretch at night, you don’t want daytime naps to be too long. The exact length may be different for each baby, but for me I found that my babies should nap for around 2 hours.
Swaddle your baby
Swaddling is the greatest! My babies have always slept better and longer when they have been swaddled. Babies love the feeling of being wrapped up tightly, and swaddling their arms helps keep them from startling awake. My favorite swaddling blanket is the Miracle Blanket. I can’t say enough good things about it! All three of my babies have used it and it has helped them sleep so well. I typically swaddle until around 3-4 months, at which point they start “escaping.” (I’ve also heard good things about the Zen Swaddle, but I haven’t used that one yet.)
Use a noise machine
In the summer, you can use a fan to drown out ambient noise, and in the winter you can use a noise machine (volume turned low) or simply an app on your tablet or phone. I use an app called “Relax Melodies” on my Kindle and it’s great! I just sounds like static/water and it helps mask the noise that is going on around the house. Babies are used to that kind of sound since the womb wasn’t a completely quiet place, so a noise machine can help mimic that environment.
Create a bedtime routine
A bedtime routine signals to your baby that it is nighttime. Try to engage all of his senses. We like to start with a warm bath, which helps the baby relax and to be fully alert for his last feeding of the day. Then, after a fresh diaper, I sing to him while giving him a massage with lotion. I dress him in his pajamas, then I nurse him on both sides and burp him. If his diaper needs to be changed again, I do that, then I swaddle him in the Miracle Blanket. I pray for him, kiss his cheek, and lay him in his crib still partially awake. The room is mostly dark (just a lamp on, for me) and the noise machine/fan is on.
My testimony:
The Lord has graced me with three beautiful babies: Vera (now 3), who slept 6 hours by 5-6 weeks and 8 hours by 8 weeks; Cordelia (now 1.5), who slept 6 hours by 6-7 weeks and 7.5-8 hours by 8 weeks; and Jude who is 7 weeks old and is sleeping 7-8 hours a night. I am thankful to the Lord for giving me these precious children and for showing me how to help them become good nighttime sleepers. I can’t take the credit – He gets the glory!
My hope and prayer for YOU is that some of these ideas and strategies might work to help your baby become a good sleeper as well. Trust God, pray a lot, and cuddle your sweet baby!
As they say… the days are long, but the years are short!
Want more info on how to create a schedule that will work for your family (even if you have multiple kids)? I recommend this ebook!
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I use the same techniques and they have worked great for all three of mine! I have nursed every three hours during the day for all three. Liam needed to eat a little more often (boys eat so much more!!!). I didn’t read Babywise until Ella was six weeks old, and it changed everything for us! Great post!
Glad to hear this has worked well for your family too!
Im a FtM how can a baby sleep 7-8 hrs at night at 7 weeks? Don’t u have to wake them up to feed them?
Hi Melica, of course talk to your pediatrician about this, but if your baby is gaining weight, is healthy, and you have a good milk supply (if you’re nursing), you don’t need to wake them up at night to feed them at 7 weeks. Wishing you the best as a first time mom!
Aliesha do you swaddle the baby for his afternoon naps too?
Yes.
I was wondering the same thing. Is it possible that a baby so young can go without being feed for 7-8 hours at night? I would think they would be hungry plus breast milk is not as filling as formula. Well at least of what I have heard. Thank you so much for sharing.
Hi Martha,
Same answer as above:
Talk to your pediatrician about this, but if your baby is gaining weight, is healthy, and you have a good milk supply (if you’re nursing), you don’t need to wake them up at night to feed them at 7 weeks.
If they wake up, feed them! But if they’re sleeping well, don’t worry about waking them up (after you’ve established a good milk supply in the first 6 weeks).
Hello! I have a 3 week old that seems to go down pretty well for a nap with the “shhh pat” method but I am curious how you just lay them down and they fall asleep? My LO would cry if I just laid her there. Is there a certain age you were able to just lay them down drowsy or were you able to do that from beginning?
Sometimes I have to do the “shhh pat” method with my 2 month old and sometimes he just falls asleep on his own. I find there is a small window for that to happen, and when I catch it, it’s awesome!
Great! That means I must be doing it right! Yay! And also Thank you for the reminder about the Lord walking us through this. I listen to the song “Beloved” by Kari Jobe as I’m putting her down for naps and tears stream every time. I so desperately need him to cover me, lead me by still waters, nourish my soul right now.. and that songs expresses it perfectly!
Also, she loves a pacy but usually spits it out before falling completely asleep. Is this ok pr am I setting myself up for a bad sleep prop?
As a mom with two thumb suckers, I say “go for it!” with the paci, since it can be taken away later but thumbs cannot. 😉
I also did everything you describe mine didn’t take 3 naps a day only 2 but both my son and daughter were sleeping 12 hours by 6 weeks. I did let them sleeping on their bellies though. And the soundmmachine is a must!
That’s great!
My son will be 6 weeks on thurs and I am trying to do baby wise but he wants to eat, play, then eat again to sleep. Is that bad??
My son will be 6 weeks on thurs and I am trying to do baby wise but he wants to eat, play, then eat again to sleep. Is that bad??
Hi Laura,
Nope, not bad! We often do eat, wake, eat, sleep. But the key is not nursing/eating to sleep. We always put our babies down to sleep when they are drowsy but not fully asleep.
Above all pray!
I was missing just that.. i know God used you to remind me.
No better doctor, no better guide, no better medicine than him.
Thank you for sharing Gby!
That is ludicrous. God is not a doctor or an alternative medicine. I believe in freedom of religion but your words are dangerous.
God is The Great Physician! He made you and your sweet little one. A word to the wise… Do you really not want Him on your side? Just food for thought.
Very kind response. 👍🏻
This is fantastic I have been teaching new mommies this same way of getting your newborn to sleep though the night… Kudos to you lil mama!!
Thank you so much! This is so helpful! Thank you for kindly sharing your experience and advice! I had no clue how to give naps/bedtime and I wish I had started doing this from the beginning. I will definitely try this from the start next time. Thank you for sharing! I always am encouraged by your words! God bless!
I’m glad this was an encouragement to you! Hopefully you can still apply some of this info.
I’m so happy to hear Jude is sleeping so well at nights for you. I think about you often and I know you have to be very busy. I know you do such a good job being a wife and mother, and your children are so blessed by your gentle care and patience.
I did read the Babywise book and I loosely followed it. I learned a few things from my babies that I just wanted to add. All my babies were born early (as in 2-3 weeks early), and they all seemed to take a few weeks longer to sleep through the night than my sister’s babies, who were all born late. My baby who was 3 weeks early didn’t sleep through the night until he was 11 or 12 weeks old. I don’t know if it is true or not, but my theory (which helped me feel better when my babies were 10+ weeks old before they slept through the night) was that since they were born early, it was a little longer until their tummies were big enough, or they had developed enough, whatever, to sleep through the night. I have no idea if that is true or not, but it helped me mentally to think that way.
I do have regrets over how I handled sleep issues for my 3rd daughter. I had a very hard time with her crying a lot. It seemed like she just wanted me to hold her. It seemed like she started using me for the “human pacifier”. It seemed like she would only sleep if I was holding her. Of course I could not hold her 24/7, and I thought she just needed to “cry it out” and learn to sleep in her crib, and so on. It finally got so bad I took her to the pediatrician (feeling like a fool, because who takes their baby to the doctor simply because they cry all the time!), bleary eyed, so exhausted I was about to fall over and could barely think, and I just told him all about her interminable crying (it had gotten to she cried even when I held her–nothing would soothe her). I found out she had pretty severe reflux, and the reason she cried every time I laid her down was because it hurt. The reason she wanted to be latched on all the time was that little bit of swallowing soothed her hurting tummy.
I was devastated. I was heartbroken because I had put her in her crib and thought she just needed to learn how to go to sleep on her own.
We did get her reflux under control, but up until she was about 1 year old, she could not lie down except to change her diaper. The rest of the time she was in seats and bouncers, and she slept on a sleep wedge with a harness (designed for babies with reflux).
I love Babywise, and I love all their sleep methods. It gives us parents some guidelines. However, anymore when I hear of babies that cry a lot, it always makes me remember my experience with my third little baby.
Keep giving us insights into your life. I love your blog!
Sally, I’m so sorry to hear about your daughter’s reflux. I’m glad you were able to find a solution that helped provide comfort to her. You’re right… any “methods” are just guidelines, and “mommy instinct” can often trump that! I also agree with what you said about babies born early or late. Sleeping longer at nights has more to do with that (due date) and with weight as well (they have to chunk up a bit!) than it does with actually birthdays!
This is a great post! I learned a lot from all the wrong things I did with my first, haha! Like you, with the second we put her in her crib drowsy but not asleep and it worked WONDERS and we never had to let her CIO like we did with the oldest after we rocked her for too many months. I think that is honestly the best tip there is! I wish I would have learned it sooner with my first (by the time people started suggesting it, it was too late-she was used to being rocked or nursed to sleep). I also aimed for at least one crib nap a day in the beginning weeks, becuase I still wanted the snuggle time but it got Colbie used to napping in her crib. Also agree w/ the sound machine-another thing we learned a few months in with the first baby, but did from day one with #2 🙂 Great post, Aliesha!
Awesome to hear your testimony too, Natalie!
Oh, but don’t miss out on the sweetness of rocking your baby!! If it’s for one nap or at night, it won’t be a needed thing. Or you can rock to drowsiness but not sleep. They get all too big all too soon. Rock that sweet baby Mama!! 😉
Girl I did it all with Reed and still at 7 months old he would not sleep 3 hrs stretches! then one night something clicked in his wee brain and BAM he slept through the night and well, you know how he sleeps now. 6pm-8am! I suppose he is now playing catch up. What i have learned after 4 dudes, is that no baby is the same, ever. All 4 of my boys had to be put on formula, all 4 had the same routines established from the beginning, and yet… all so different at night. Caleb was my only one that slept through the night early on, he was 2 weeks old and slept 8 hr stretches! insane… Taite was a bout 3-4 months old? and then Owen was 5 months old… but Reed, boy! I thought id loose my mind with his sleep habits.
oh and I got to add, I did the babywise stuff to the T with all 4, still different results 😉 – like I said, each baby has his own agenda apparently, or maybe the Lord was telling me to stop having babies, cause after Reed I am cured for quiet some time. He is a precious blessing who I cant get enough of, but after 7 mo of no sleep, im cured from wanting to do that again for many years 🙂
What you dealt with with Reed was so rough! I might end up with a baby like that too at some point. 🙂 I am thankful for a God who gives us grace in the midst of trials like that!
i was blessedwith our first child he was a dream, easy easy….then God humbled me with our second and then third child, our children are 3.5, 2, and 1. i very literally had only 6 full nights of sleep in two years because my younger two just were restless and believe we tried it all,,CIO,90 minute sleep method, babywise, swaddling….praise God two months ago our youngest finally started sleeping 12 hours straight. parenting is humbling and we need God and support to make it
Thanks for sharing that great reminder that we need humility and dependence on God! You’re so right!
my lactation consultant and pediatrician said to absolutely not do this. its still really important for them to wake during the night for feedings!
obviously your kiddos are healthy and well cared for but it seems like you should at least have a strong disclaimer.
Hi Brenna, Definitely follow the advice of your pediatrician and lactation consultant. That’s why I said in this post that this is what has worked for our family but maybe not yours. If Jude woke up in the night I would of course feed him, but at this point since he is in the 90th percentile for weight, he is nursing great, and my milk supply is strong, I don’t need to wake him up to feed him at night. But again, follow the guidance you’ve been given by professionals. Thanks for commenting!
My three children have all slept through the night by 1 1/2 months. My first two basically started doing this on their own, and then my third, I breastfed throughout the day a lot, and established that he’d sleep from about 7 to 7. He probably cried a bit the first night or two, but after that, he was good to go! My mom would say that when your baby cries in the night, to quietly go and check them, but if they’re fine, then just let them fall back asleep. And my babies have consistently done that. I think a good night’s sleep for a mom means that she has energy to love and care for her children all day long!! Thank you for your posts. 🙂
littlehouseinthehills.blogspot.com
That’s wonderful, Tricia! I’m glad you had such a great experience!
I was wondering what to do when you lay your baby down tired but awake and they don’t drift off….how do you help get them started? My lil guy is just over 5 weeks old and has been rocked to sleep or is asleep after eating and placed in crib. We let our first one CIO at about 4m onths and it really only took 2 nights which isnt bad but if you can avoid it why not?!
Jaime, You may find that letting your little guy fuss for a few minutes will be all it takes for him to fall asleep. Set a timer for an amount of time you feel comfortable letting him cry (like 7 minutes) and then go do something else. If he hasn’t fallen asleep in that time and is still crying, go in and comfort him. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t. I hate to hear my babies cry, but I do believe in sleep training. Go with your gut – if you want to pick him up and snuggle him after he’s failed to go to sleep on his own, do it. Try again the next time! There’s really no perfect formula.
Actually, there is a proven formula. Do some research before you start giving advice like you know what you’re talking about. The proven method is not letting your baby cry it for ANY minutes! Research is showing that crying it out can cause post traumatic stress in babies as well as cause neurological changes in their brains!!! It is damaging!!! It is harmful!!! And it is permanent!!!
That is ridiculous – research has consistently indicated otherwise – CIO for a healthy, fed, dry baby is not in any way scarring and instead helps babies to learn how to self soothe and sleep. I say this as a mother of three and as a medical doctor.
Everyone has a right to sleep train or not, and a right to do whatever they feel is best for their babies – inducing fear with false claims of PTSD is absolutely unfair and unwarranted.
thank you for the tidbit about how some women can’t or choose not to breastfeed & how that doesn’t make you a bad mom! i won’t be able to breastfeed b/c of medicine i have to take. while i feel that if you can breastfeed, it’s important to for so many reasons, i don’t feel it’s the only right way to feed your child. thank you for being so encouraging.
I have a question on swaddling. Do you still swaddle for the day timennaps? My little guy will be 6 weeks and the thought of sleeping through the night is amazing! My first 2 it seems like they didn’t sleep all night until they were toddlers. I am sure that was a me thing but here’s to a new start with my third!
I do swaddle for day time naps as well. 🙂 Hope things go well for you!
Hi Aliesha, thanks so much for this very helpful post- I have one question though. I’ve read Babywise and I encountered this same question there, too. You suggest that we keep our baby on a 2-3 hour schedule in a constant rotation of eat-wake-sleep, but then you say that babies should sleep up to two hours at a time and only have three naps a day. Does this mean that there will be some eat-wake-sleep cycles where the baby doesn’t sleep?
I think I might just be missing something obvious but I’m super confused about this. Right now my four month old is basically taking six 45-minute naps a day, because I try to keep her on the eat-wake-sleep cycle, but it’s exhausting for me and she isn’t sleeping through the night, so I think I must be doing something wrong…
Thanks for the help! 🙂
Short answer: yes. There will be times when the baby eats and is awake where he/she does not sleep afterwards. Some babies are more “munchy” than others. 🙂
This is basically what we did with our first child as well and he was sleeping through the night at two months (12 hours). He always slept well during the day as well. We did, however, guide him towards a feeding schedule (much like the french do actually). The major difference is that I formula-fed from the get-go. It is really nice to see that others are having this success while breastfeeding as well. I had many people saying it was because he was formula-fed instead of breastfed. I’m glad that other’s have success and have what I recently read was a “unicorn baby.” 🙂 Thank you for posting!
I find it helps to tell my baby its time to sleep. it also works for burping! we often forget that babies are humans too and their ability to understand goes far beyond our comprehension! I simply say as I’m wrapping, and placing bubs down “it’s time to sleep now, mummy loves you, and prays you have a wonderful sleep. good night little one xx.”
Thank you for sharing this! I am due tomorrow and have been trying to research how to get a baby to sleep through the night, but I refuse to sleep train and let my baby cry it out. I like your techniques because baby never has to feel neglected in order for the both of you to get a good nights sleep!
Thank you for your reminder to pray. I pray for my new baby, but I could pray more often and more thoughtfully. I appreciate your example.
Reading through all of this, I never read anything that said don’t feed your baby at night.in fact, it said feed your baby when he wakes up and then put him right back to
sleep.if you feel that your baby has gone too long without eating, you may feed him.I think at a certain point however the baby should be able to sleep all through the night. I think it helps to note that this blog author said that she feeds on demand. that tells me that the baby is getting plenty of food during the day and doesn’t really need a lot more at night. But if you feel that your baby does need more at night, you may feed him.nobody said you couldn’t.I just think that at some point, not too long, the baby should sleep throughout the night.
Did your babies sleep in the crib in the nursery at night from the get-go or in a bassinet in mama’s room? Just curious if/when you made the transition to the nursery or if you just started them there?
Our babies have all slept in a pack ‘n’ play in our room at first (well, for several months). We made the transition to their crib in their rooms later (6+ months). Jude hasn’t transitioned yet.
As a mommy to be, this is such a helpful post! Did you follow the BabyWise schedule of waking up at 7 and an hour later putting baby down for a 2 hour nap or just follow the “Eat, Wake, Sleep” pattern (ex: baby wakes up whenever on its own, you feed & play, put back to bed shortly after?)?
Thanks so much!
As a soon to be mommy, this is super helpful! I’m curious—did the baby wake up on its own & you fed, played, put back to bed OR did you follow the Babywise schedule of waking up baby at 3 hour intervals-ish?
I also noticed you said you fed on demand during the day. What about at night?
Thanks so much!!
We don’t have a “schedule” (i.e. 7am wake up, 10am nap) as much as we have a routine (i.e. wake up, play, nap, etc.). I have always fed on demand whenever my baby has needed it (day or night). Currently, Jude sleeps through the night, but if he ever woke in the night, I would nurse him. I’m not very “strict” about all this, am I?
This whole post makes me very very sad. Your baby should NOT be sleeping through the night at six weeks. That is ridiculous and not good for your child. Doctors, midwives, parents will tell you that a baby needs to be eating very two hours and that you should be waking your child not allowing them to sleep through the night. It makes me so sad that you are touting all of this knowledge and all of these women are so happy that you are giving them advice on doing something that is AGAINST nature.
My daughter is just about 4 weeks old and since she has been born has only woken up once in the night. She was gaining weight okay, so the doctor and lactation nurse both days it was okay to let her sleep..she continues to sleep anywhere from 4-7 hour stretches at night.
My baby is almost 4 weeks old and has only ever woken up once in the night…even in the hospital. The doctors and lactation nurses both said she was gaining weight ok, so I didn’t need to wake her up in the night as long as she’s eating consistently throughout the day. Now, at night, she still sleeps anywhere between 4-7 hour stretches.
Judgy little thing aren’t you? My girls both slept through the night by 6 weeks. Occasionally they’d wake up to be fed, but quite often they just slept. Both were in the upper 90th percentiles for weight and height and extremely healthy and never had any problems. It’s simple: If Baby’s hungry, feed Baby. If Baby wants to sleep, let Baby sleep. That’s about as “natural” as it comes. I don’t know what this “against nature” is about…
Hello everyone, I am a mother of nine and have nursed all but the second last one ( because, of post natal complications). I just wanted to say that nursing/ feeding on demand is what has always worked for me. A child does not need to be reminded to eat, they know when they are hungry and believe me, you will know too. You don’t need to wake your child to eat as long as you feed on demand and they are gaining weight. That being said, there are still many health professionals who would disagree. Parenting comes from experience and getting to know your child, not a book from Chapters.
Thanks for sharing your wisdom as a mom of nine, Crystal!
I breastfeed on demand and have had three babies who didn’t need to feed much in the night. Yesterday I was at our four-week midwife appointment and I was told that since my baby’s weight gain is excellent and he is “so very healthy, to “keep doing what I am doing!”
I don’t think that you can presume to speak for all doctors and midwives on the nighttime sleep issue. Mothers need to be aware of what their individual babies need. This differs from baby to baby.
I have had 2 that slept through the night at 6 weeks. They are very happy and healthy. How is a routine against nature. Nature is a routine. Dont post hateful comments presuming you have talked to every doctor and they say
its bad. My girls doc thought it was awesome that they were satisfied enough to sleep. Every child is different. May be different if your child is small but mine were and still are in the 90th percentile. They eat like crazy during the day and sleep like a rock at night. See nothing wrong with it
My sweet twins left the NICU at 1 week old already sleeping in 4 hour stretches. They were 6 weeks early. Both of them began to sleep 6-7 hours per night before they were 6 weeks old. They gained weight and ate better on a schedule that included more sleep at night. By 12 weeks they started sleeping 12 hours at night. Stressing your baby out by waking him every two hours to eat is potentially harmful. As long as your baby is thriving- keep doing what works for him or her.
My doctor said that until 5 weeks, I shouldn’t allow my son to go longer than 5 hours without waking him to eat. And that after 5 weeks, I don’t need to wake him to eat, just to feed him if he wakes. Well from 5-8 weeks he would wake once per night after about 6-7 hours. By 8 weeks he was sleeping totally through the night. 8-9 hours. He was full term, 8 lbs, gained steadily, never skinny. He typically cluster fed at night before bed. So this method is totally in line with medical advice for a FULL TERM healthy gaining baby. Obviously the ped visits are frequent at this age so its easy enough to conifrm with your own doctor. But this idea of waking every two hours in the night is ludicrous. The mom would be endangering the baby by being that sleep deprived. Even at one week old we let him go up to 5 hours in the night per the doctor.
my first slept through 6 hours the first night home from the hospital and never stopped. The second did not. All children are different and some will wake up in the night no matter what you do. Swaddling is good if the child likes it. Others hate it.
Thank-you for such an informative and helpful post. I have read a lot of advice on babies and sleep/routine. I didn’t fully connect with baby wise because of strict routines and I find it reassuring that someone else has found a happy balance that establishes independence with trust and love. Quick question for you, at what age did you start having your baby nap in the crib? How long did your babies nap at 2 weeks? My little girl is 2 weeks old and I dont want her to oversleep during the day but want to make sure she slleeps enough. Thanks again!
I can’t remember exactly when my girls started napping in their cribs, but with Jude it was pretty early on (for at least 1 or 2 naps a day), mainly because the rest of the house was so noisy he wasn’t very likely to fall asleep in the living room. 😉 I’d say at 2 weeks you shouldn’t let naps be longer than 1.5-2 hours.
Did you swaddle your babies for naps as well?
Yes. 🙂
I’m a mommy to be. 🙂 when did you start this? As soon as you got back from the hospital?
I started a lot of this with Jude when he was first born (swaddling, noise machine, breastfeeding on demand, bedtime routine, etc.), but he napped on my chest and in my arms a lot at first. 🙂 I didn’t want to miss out on those crazy sweet moments! It’s totally fine to wait until 6-8 weeks to even think about starting to put the baby in the crib to sleep for naps. Just go with your mama instincts. Every baby is different!
Im trying so very hard to follow these tips but nothing seems to be working. I have a lot going on during the day, preparing to go back to work and going to school, and my little one tends to sleep in the car so when we are go go go he sleep sleep sleeps then at night he wants to be awake, I try keeping him up as much as possible but im struggling as a new mom not to just let him sleep when he is fussy and tired. I don’t know what the right answer is here. I feel like im being selfish or mean by not letting him sleep when hes tired
You’re doing a great job! It’s totally fine for your little one to sleep in the car. The thing I might try is to get him nice and awake for his last feeding before nighttime. A bath can be great for helping him be alert and realized that it’s bedtime (once you start doing this every night to “signal” that it’s nighttime). I find that my babies have slept better at night when they’ve gotten a good feeding right before bed! Also, if your baby is quite young (under 4 months), it may be too early to get a good routine going. Just do the best you can!
I think more emphasis should be put on the every baby is different part so has not to discourage mothers who are doing everything but their babies still won’t sleep through the night. Also doctors label 5 hrs as sleeping through the night, a far cry from what many mothers call a full nights sleep. Lastly before 6 weeks most babies should be waking to eat during the night and that should not be discouraged. I’ve had 4 children and they were all different. The first slept through the night from 2 months until she started teething and then on and off through the months. She absolutely despised swaddling in any form. My 2nd loved swadding and slept 7+ hours every night from the day he was born. My 3rd didn’t seem to care either way about swaddling so we swaddled him in the beginning but he needed far less sleep than the average baby. He was only taking 1 nap by 4 months. And despite my best efforts had given up naps completely by a year old. (Our peditrician recommend it) Then my last baby had intolerances to foods I ate that were passed througg my breastmilk and appeared to have colic until I did an elimination diet. She was very high needs even after that and did not know the meaning of fuss. She would go from zero to all out red faced gaging herself screaming if you set her down. Although routines are good premies, babies with medical issues, babies with issues gaining weight are not good candidates for sleep training.
Did you still have to nurse him during the night?
When I said he was sleeping through the night, I meant he was going that long without nursing. 🙂
I love your testimony and how you pray for them! I am so going to do that….in the future….because I’m only fourteen right now….but yeah!
It’s never too early to begin praying for your future husband and children!
Of all the advice I’ve read, I really identified with yours the best! Would you mind giving me a break down of more a less the times of day your little one has their naps? I’m specifically interested in the evening nap and routine because I’m still not 100% sure that I’m happy with my night time routine. My little one is 6 weeks old 🙂 thank you so much! X
I’m excited to try out your tips with baby #2 due in August. Our first baby slept pretty well at first but we had a hard time getting her to sleep through the whole night (even when we knew she wasn’t hungry, she woke up several times through the night from 6-14 months or so.) I’m definitely going to do something things differently this time! I think the advice of not rocking them or holding them to sleep is key! And also the Wonder Weeks were bang on for my daughter too, we found it helpful just to know when something was going on, they weren’t fussy for no reason. Thanks!
You’re welcome!
My sweet little baby isn’t here yet (17 short weeks to go, lol) but I’m trying to get all the knowledge now on how to best handle the first few months and I really enjoyed this post. I most appreciate how you mention prayer. He cares about everyone young or old and I too know that He is a source of comfort and help. I am totally pinning this on my newborn board to reread in just about 4 months. 🙂 Thanks again!
Thanks for your sweet comment! Congrats on your baby-to-come!
My little one is almost 3 months old and I’m definitely going to start this routine!!! When was your little ones last feeding time at night and did u bathe or feed first…I’m dying for more sleep at night lol thanks
We would bathe first and then feed. That way he/she would be more awake for the feeding and would eat really well before bed! Hope things get better for you.
You sound like such a sweet sister in Christ! I actually have a Judah! Thank you for the reminder to PRAY about it! It’s so funny, but none of the sleep books cover what to do if you have a sick newborn and how to get THEM to sleep after health ordeals! LOL! OR… since I have 3 children all your same ages… HOW do you spend the time getting them to sleep and still take care of the others! haha! That’s where the Ergo comes in for us! I’m trying to get us on a sleep routine now that we are mostly home (not in hospitals) and it’s tough! Praying he only wakes up 1x tonight! haha!
I agree! I loved the prayer reminder and my son’s middle name is Judah! 🙂
Hello and HELP!
I have a 3 1/2 month old who is still waking about 2 times at night (between 9pm and 6am). He will only go stretches of 5 hours at night, at most. He DID go longer at night (6 hours) when he was around 6-8 weeks old, but then started waking every 3-5 hours again. I have been following many of the guidelines of Babywise as well (eat, wake, sleep, and teaching him to put himself to sleep). He does the routine well, except I do not have a specific time I feed him, I just feed when he is hungry-after he wakes. He does not take very long naps, usually between 45 min-1 hour, its much more rare when he sleeps 1.5-2 hours. I have been doing most of what you posted here…so I’m confused. Not sure what I am doing wrong. Could it be a milk supply thing, or could he be waking up just to cuddle and be with me? I feed him like 5-6 times during the hours of 7am-8pm, and 2-3 times between 8pm-6am. (Roughly every 2-3 hours during the day-when he shows hunger signs). How can I know if he NEEDS to be fed at night for the calories, or if he is just WANTS to be? I would love your feedback about night sleep and naps. He is my first, and I am grateful for the wisdom of moms who have done this before. Thank you and blessings!
It sounds like you are doing a great job! If your baby seems hungry, definitely feed him. He may be going though a growth spurt or cognitive leap right now that is making him need you more right now. Talk with your pediatrician about the night waking, since I’m not a doctor. 🙂 I usually err on the side of feeding too much (anytime he wants to eat) rather than to err on not feeding him enough! Try and make sure he is getting a good feeding (hind milk that comes when your milk “lets down”) each time he eats. Hope things get better for you!
Where do your babies sleep at night? In the crib?
Where do your babies sleep at night when they are a newborn and as they grow older?
Our babies have slept in a small portable crib in our bedroom when they are little, then we’ve moved them to their own bedroom in a full-sized crib around 7-9 months.
Hi,
I nursed my baby for 15 months and the first 12 months she came twice during the night… Then only once and she slept through when I stopped breastfeeding. I have done every single advice you told except for the special blanket you used the first three months. Now my son, who is one month old only comes once during the night (for which I am already very thankful!) Any other advice to let him sleep through the night very soon?
I’m sure you’re doing many great things to help your son sleep well! Three months is a hard age for some reason, but I have found it gets better from there. It’s hard again around 5 months, then much better after that. All babies are different and some don’t sleep through the night for much longer, but we love them anyway, right? 😉 Blessings to you!
Any advice for a 4 month old that wakes every 3 hours in the night (and eats every 3 hours in the day)? He has had lots of tummy issues and usually would wake because he had spit up in the bed and on himself. Now that he’s not spitting up he’s still waking to eat.
It sounds like he still needs his mama in the night, so keep doing what you’re doing! You may want to try letting him self-soothe for a few minutes before getting him, like 2 minutes one night, and 5 the next. He may fall asleep during that time, or he may still need to nurse. Keep up the good work!
I don’t have kids yet but I’m pinning this to use when I do! Thank you!
I have 4 children 28, 26, 24 and 22 years of age now. I did all of this except the noise machine since we did not have those back in the day. All my children slept through the night by 6-8 weeks. I don’t think I would have had four children if they were horrible sleepers because I can’t function without sleep. Many of my friends envied me but they did not want to put their children on a schedule or a routine which believe me translated into the difficulties of them as teenagers that some of them had. I was a young mom of 21 when I had my first and this routine came innately to me. Thank God! I am saving this for my children so they will realize it worked back then, it still works today. Swaddling is a big key and so is the consistency of putting them to bed in their own crib when they are still awake. I only hope mothers today listen to this excellent advice, it will save them many an exhausted night. You will need to save your strength for the teenage years! lol
What a blessing! Thanks for sharing your story!
I’m stressing over the napping schedule. I’m always wondering “is this considered his morning nap, afternoon nap, etc! My one week old takes more than 3 naps during the day though he can go for those long 2-2.5 hour naps. Any advice for a first time mom? He does well at night, going for 3-4 stretches….guess not too bad for one week old.
Just enjoy your little one week old! Sounds like he is doing wonderfully. They sleep a LOT in the beginning! You can start trying to form somewhat of a schedule when he’s a little older… no need to stress right now!
Mine is cluster feeding for 4 hours from anywhere between 9:30 pm to 12-1 am sometimes! Any advice? We are trying to move his clustering schedule up. I’m so overwhelmed as a new mom.
You might try just starting to feed him earlier each night (which it sounds like you’re trying to do). If he normally starts cluster feeding at 9:30, start feeding him at 9:15 instead. Keep backing it up slowly each night. Mine usually cluster fed early on, so what you’re going through is normal!
My kids are 21 and 14. I read this article and chuckled because this is exactly what I did many, many years ago, mostly because it just made sense to me. My kids were always great sleepers. People used to marvel that I put my kids to bed drowsy but awake, but that is really the trick
Thanks for sharing this!
My 5 week old is waking every 4 hours at night…Im looking forward to be able to fet a good nights rest so I can function better thruout the day. I cant swaddle him because he’s one of those babies that hates it. How can I get him to sleep thru the night without it? He can sleep thru all kinds of noise though. Lol I have a 2.5 yr old that keeps things lively!
That’s awesome he can sleep through lots of noise! You may be able to try something like a Halo SleepSack to help keep him somewhat “secured” but not as restricted as a swaddle. You can also try swaddling again in a week or two, since babies sometimes end up liking swaddling even when they hated it at first (that would be my first daughter, Vera)!
I love what you said – the days are long but the years are short. I am a first time mom with a one month old and am already realizing how true this is! The importance of prayer has also been so clear to me!
Our little girl doesn’t like her arms swaddled (or else we just aren’t good enough at it haha). But I do want to start putting her to bed drowsy but awake. We haven’t really done this at all but I have read so much about the importance of it. Do you have any advice for starting that now? Just give her a few minutes and if it didn’t work, rock her and try again?
Thank you!
You may want to give swaddling another try in a week or two, since babies sometimes end up liking swaddling even when they hated it at first (that would be my first daughter, Vera)! Regarding putting her to bed drowsy, you will have to find the “sweet spot” where she is just sleepy enough to fall asleep on her own but not yet asleep. When she goes heavy in your arms, it’s too late 😉 but you’ll have to figure out for her when that perfect moment is. Keep praying and snuggling that sweet baby! She’s still really little, so you have time to get a good routine going!
Thanks for your response – I will definitely continue praying, as that’s all that gets me through some minutes, hours, and days. This being a mother thing is the biggest challenge I’ve ever faced. And our little girl is getting so overtired that I’ve given in to her napping in her swing tonight to give us all a little rest.
One other question, if you have time to answer… I think our little girl has a problem with gas and being really uncomfortable. Did you ever deal with this with any of your children? If so, any tips on helping them sleep? Our girl seems to be really uncomfortable even, or especially, when sleeping. She grunts and moves so much; it seems she doesn’t get very much good deep sleep.
Thanks for any tips or prayers you can offer!
Hello there,
Thank you for the great advice! Our baby girl is 4 weeks old and she loves to be rocked to sleep and or fall asleep during or after nursing. Would you suggest that I wake her after she falls asleep at the breast and play for a bit to keep the eat-play-sleep routine
She’s still so young, so just trust your instincts. New babies almost always fall asleep nursing/eating! It’s enough of a “job” just to keep them awake long enough to nurse fully! 😉 As she gets a little older (6-8 weeks?), I would start trying to finish the nursing session before she falls asleep fully. Then you can put her in her bed when she is drowsy, content, and “milk drunk” but not quite asleep.
Hi Aliesha, riding on this topic my almost 8 wk old boy still falls asleep after a few mins of nursing. Very often, if he doesn’t fall asleep he will refuse to continue nursing. But 45mins later (after his play time and right before I put him to nap), he will want to nurse again! So it messes up my ‘eat play sleep’ routine! It always ends up ‘eat play eat sleep’! Should I be correcting this and refuse to let him nurse a second time? Or should I just accept that this is his habit? 🙁
If he’s still going to sleep on his own (not nursing to sleep) and eating full feedings (not just snacks), I wouldn’t worry about it! You’re doing great!
Or to start* the routine? Thank you!!
I currently have the Summer SwaddleMe swaddle blankets, but I’m nervous to use it because the velcro is so loud and I worry about it making too much noise at nighttime diaper changes. Does the Miracle Blanket have velcro? Have you had any issues with it making noises when unwrapping for diaper changes?
The Miracle Blanket doesn’t have any velcro, so that wasn’t an issue for us. I guess you can try the SwaddleMe and see if it works for you! 🙂
Every baby is different. I did all of the above (except he napped way more in my arms!) and my little boy is still not sleeping through the night at 13 months! I had a big problem with finding the perfect time to lay him down: he would look very drowsy but as soon as I put him down he would be wide awake and try his best not to fall asleep.. If I waited any longer he’d be asleep. Then we’d try again with similar results. Oh well, will keep on trying…Maybe the next one will sleep more?
I’m sorry you’ve struggled to get your baby sleeping through the night. Like you said, every baby is different! Enjoy those extra cuddles… this season will be over before you know it!
Our daughter is Vera too! She is almost 2 weeks old and already hates the crib. I am getting Babywise soon in the mail and want to start switching her sleep cycle as soon as possible! Thank you for this post!
Aww! We don’t know any other Veras! 🙂 At two weeks, she is still pretty young to start working on a sleep routine, so don’t sweat it if things aren’t going great yet. You have plenty of time! Enjoy those newborn cuddles!
I found this post through Pinterest as I’m seeking to establish better sleep habits for my two-day-old than my two-year-old has. Beyond the wisdom of your suggestions alone, I found your post to seem like it was destined for me to read; my newborn’s name is Jude, and if that wasn’t coincidental enough, my firstborn would have been named Cordelia if he had been a girl. Eerie. 🙂 Thank you for sharing these words of wisdom!
That is too funny! You have great taste in names. 😉
Did you start the “bedtime routine” at a certain time each night?
Do you start the “bedtime routine” at a certain time each night?
Yes. When Jude was little, it was 10:00. Then we pushed it back to 9:00, then 8:00, and now it’s 7:00 (he’s over a year old now). I did it incrementally each night (just 5 or 10 minutes earlier each night).
If you put them down when they are”milk drunk” what about burping? I burp Aaron within 5 min of feeding, but he wakes up after. Should I rock him back to sleepy and then put him down?
I usually just softly burped them and it didn’t really disturb them too much. Again, I didn’t put my babies to bed asleep, but awake. Maybe try putting Aaron down right after you burp him and see what happens! He may be so sleepy that he just drifts off on his own.
Great advice! I still have time before Baby #1 is born but these are super tips. The most beautiful thing is reading from a fellow believer! May God continue to use you for His glory and to help counsel others. God bless you abundantly! Blessings from Windsor, Canada.
Thank you! Congrats on baby #1!
Thank you for sharing your tips! After your children starting sleeping through the night, I’m assuming they started to nurse more during the day to make up for the feeding lost in the middle of the night. Would you mind sharing what your daily routine/schedule looked like in terms of nursing and naps? I’m trying to figure out how and where to add in the additional feeding during the day, so my little one no longer needs to nurse at night.
Thanks Ashley
As far as nursing, go with your gut, whether that means scheduling feedings or nursing on demand. We followed somewhat of a routine, but also nursed on demand much more frequently than Babywise talks about doing. You might try adding a feeding just before afternoon nap, as long as your baby will be fully awake when you put him or her down for nap. I know that doesn’t follow the eat-wake-sleep cycle, but as long as they are put in their crib awake, it seems to work out fine. 🙂
Thank you for sharing your tips! After your children starting sleeping through the night, I’m assuming they started to nurse more during the day to make up for the feeding lost in the middle of the night. Would you mind sharing what your daily routine/schedule looked like in terms of nursing and naps? I’m trying to figure out how and where to add in the additional feeding during the day, so my little one no longer needs to nurse at night.
Thanks Ashley
When did you start the putting them down in their crib on their own/swaddling? 4 weeks? or earlier? Did you start right after they were born maybe for one nap or did you mostly rock to sleep or let them fall asleep on your chest?
I can appreciate a lot in your blog post but “Babywise” has a lot of draw backs and is a dangerous book. Seems like the key issues people take issue with in the book, you don’t apply but even suggesting a book like that is dangerous IMO. The book recommends dangerous parenting and the authors themselves lack of expertise and credentials.
AAP releases Warning for Ezzo’s “Babywise”
http://bliss-breastfeeding.blogspot.com/2010/01/aap-releases-warning-for-ezzos-babywise.html
Anyway, like I said, it doesn’t appear you or your blog but I think there should be a note about the dangers of “Babywise” to babies.
Thanks for your comment, Lucy! In this post, I don’t recommend Babywise (because I haven’t read it), but I did want to give credit to the ideas I use that have come from that book (through friends, etc.) so that people wouldn’t give me grief for just ripping off their ideas and acting like I came up with it. 🙂 I appreciate your word of caution regarding that book!
I love your post! I saw your article on pinterest and have been doing most of what you suggest (except for the eat-play-sleep schedule) and my 2 month old has started sleeping 7 hours straight, followed by a quick nurse, and then another 3 hours. I really like how your post is honest and realistic – not telling people their 6 week olds need to be sleeping 12 straight hours or they’re a failure.
I don’t think God would want my baby to be left to cry-it-out, so I’m happy to have found a nice little routine. I hope you and your family are doing well 🙂
That’s fantastic that your little one is sleeping so well already! Glad that you’ve found a rhythm that works for your family!
I could do the math but I’m just not that great! How old your was second child when you got pregnant with your little one? I nurse on demand and my first is 10 months and I just don’t see myself ovulating any time soon! Just curious about your situation : )
I got pregnant with CC when Vera was around nine months old, then I got pregnant with Jude when CC was around 10 months old. This might be TMI, but I actually ovulated before I had a period when I was nursing CC, so we weren’t sure exactly when Jude was due at first! So you could watch for signs of your fertility returning … it could be anytime! Some women don’t ovulate until they are completely finished nursing, so your situation may be different than mine.
Thank you so much for sharing your wonderful experience with us all.
It has helped me with my third child and I’m really glad that I came across it.
Swaddling doesn’t work in our warm climate but I tried everything else. I am able to bathe,feed, burp and put my 3 month old little girl in her port-a-cot by 7pm each evening, and she wakes once to feed through the night and is up by 7am.
Thank you for mentioning and reminding us all of the ‘God’ factor which is so important.
God Bless you and your beautiful family! Xox
I’m so glad this has helped you, Trina! Blessings to you!
such a great blog post and very inspiring for a mother to be. thank you!
Hi there Thankyou for the wonderful info! I have a 2 week old at home and my biggest challenge is putting her to sleep drowsy but awake! She always seems to wake up and cry and squirm the moment I put her in her crib. How did you get yours to a drowsy state without rocking, nursing etc? She’s done it a few times but it’s a real struggle! Especially at nighttime
At nighttime, try nursing her but not nursing her to sleep. She’ll ideally be “milk drunk” and drowsy enough to fall asleep on her own in the crib. She’s also really little, so things may be easier for you in a couple of weeks!
Thankyou so much for replying ❤️
hi I love the advice I have a 3 .5 year old and soon to have another one. I will definitely take a lot of your advice.. Could you share with me how do you organise sleeping routines for the others… My 3.5 has the routine of read a book, pray and two songs before she sleeps we all sleep in the same room as we have a bed sitter n the baby’s coat n my toddlers bed is all in same room … Wondering how will I not end up having two routines.
I would just do the routine of reading, praying, and singing all together. We typically do something similar and then all the kids go down at the same time (though only two of them share a room).
My little one is now 7 weeks old, and I am having a hard time getting him into a routine. He never eats, plays, sleeps the same time each day. Some days he may nap 30 minutes or may nap 3 hours. Some nights he will wait 4 hours to wake up and eat and some nights 2. I also have the hardest time putting him down at night. I always rock him to sleep but starting letting him CIO this week ( which isn’t going well). I always have a sound machine on when he sleeps and half way swaddle since he hates his arms constricted. Once I lay him down to sleep ( eyes are heavy but not asleep yet) he will sleep for 10 minutes and wake up crying. I let him cry for 5 to 10 minutes and we start the process over and over again for two hours. How do I start to get him on a schedule? Do I go cold turkey and totally stop rocking him to sleep before naps and bedtime to follow your methods? Thanks for the tips!
Hi Michelle, every sweet baby is different, and each family has to make decisions about scheduling or not, etc. I would encourage you to go with your gut here. If you feel like rocking is what he needs right now, go for it! As your son gets older, you will see more patterns emerge in his daily routine that will make it easier to get him on a schedule. Don’t worry too much about it for now. Cuddle that sweet baby!
Thank God for this post!
My baby is 4 weeks old and I’m not sure if it’s too early to really start a routine for him. Thoughts? I’ll go back to work when he’s 12 weeks, so a routine and a good night’s rest will be important for my husband and I.
My baby sleeps on me 90% of the time and I’ll rock him and sing him to sleep, but again, wondering if this is ok at such a young stage. He’ll sleep in his swing during the day but will not sleep in his basinet more than 3 hours. I wonder if it’s because he hates it in there or what!
Lastly, your first point-to pray-is literally the best advice. I should be talking to The Lord way more and seeking his wisdom. I have been lacking in this area and know if I begin doing this as I should, everything will work out. So if nothing else, thank you for that! Amen 🙂
I think what you’re doing at this stage is great. I probably would try to start getting him on a routine before you go back to work, but I’m sure everything will work out if he’s not totally there yet by 12 weeks! Start with the daytime routine and then try incorporating bedtime rituals.
Thank God for this post!
My baby is 4 weeks old and I’m not sure if it’s too early to really start a routine for him. Thoughts? I’ll go back to work when he’s 12 weeks, so a routine and a good night’s rest will be important for my husband and I.
My baby sleeps on me 90% of the time and I’ll rock him and sing him to sleep, but again, wondering if this is ok at such a young stage. He’ll sleep in his swing during the day but will not sleep in his basinet more than 3 hours at night. I wonder if it’s because he hates it in there or what!
Lastly, your first point-to pray-is literally the best advice. I should be talking to The Lord way more and seeking his wisdom. I have been lacking in this area and know if I begin doing this as I should, everything will work out. So if nothing else, thank you for that! Amen 🙂
This is a great post! I recently wrote a blog about how I got my 6 week old to sleep through the night, check it out by following my (shortened for space) link: http://bit.ly/1C3tFgA I am new to the blogging world and really wanting to connect with other mothers out there to share the hurdles we face. Hope to see you there!
Hi! Thank you for the post. I have one question tho. You say that the shedule should be ‘eat, play, sleep’, but the night time routine ‘sleep, eat, play, bath, pjs & diper, eat (again?) and sleep’? Or ‘sleep, paly, bath, pjs & diper, eat, sleep’? Please help med understand. Thank you again.
Our bedtime routine looked like this: wake, bath, diaper, pajamas, eat, (diaper again if needed), song, sleep.
Did you swaddle your baby for naps as well? My baby seems to fall asleep in the swing (not always moving, I put her in there so she can sit up and see me). I don’t know if I should move her, out of fear of having an over tired crying baby.
Also were any of your babies colicky at all? My poor babe seems to be and prefers being inclined a bit but I really want her in her crib as soon as I can. I’m just wondering if you found a certain age where the crying decreased.
Hi Cristina, we swaddled for naps too. My babies were not colicky, but I do know that the peak crying age for babies is between 2 weeks and 3-4 months. It starts to level out after that, depending on the baby.
My breastfed 7 week old is waking 2-3 times a night. I’m trying so hard to keep a routine like eat-wake-sleep during the day but he almost always falls asleep while he eats, or during his burping sometimes before he will burp! If I continue to hold him he will sleep well 1-2 hours but if I put him down he always wakes up not even 20mins later often with gas if not burped! How are u keeping ur baby awake after feedings? And awake long enough to burp? I feel like a failure seeing my baby wake upwith a gassy tummy and tears. His nighttime routine is very similar to yours. I just question feeding him before his bath so he gets a full belly and have to wake him to bathe or after his bath while he is all snuggly risking him falling asleep toosoon and waking up hungry.
One of the challenges of breastfeeding is keeping that baby awake! I totally understand. And as to the burping, I usually just gently burped my babies right after eating and it didn’t seem to disturb them too much. If you think your baby is more prone to gas, maybe talk to the pediatrician about when you can start using gas drops. We would bathe and then nurse… for us it seemed like the bath really helped wake Jude up enough to nurse really well before going to bed!
My baby slept through the night at 4 weeks and I didn’t follow any specific set of rules or routines…just saying sometimes it just boils down to when the baby is ready.. in my experience that’s usually the way it goes…as much as we as parents think that every move we make is what determines outcomes for our babies, we can also just drive ourselves crazy thinking all baby needs is a routine when really what they need most is time and patience to figure it out on their own.
I’m glad you were blessed with such a great sleeper, Kristen!
I LOVE this advise. I have a 5 year old soon and my soon to be husband and I will be trying for another after getting married. My son will be 7 by the time new baby would be born so I will be very out of practice when it comes to babies. With my son I did all the wrong things when it came to sleeping so I paid for it and he did not sleep through the night until he was 2 years old!!! I am NOT doing that the next go around and I love the advise you gave! Thank you for all your help! Pinning this to read a year from now!
Also, its so refreshing to see you added prayer to your list, 🙂
Thank you so much for your sweet comment, Rebecca! Blessings to you and your family!
thank you for your advice… May lord Jesus bless you
Great advice, beautifully put. Thank you for sharing these tips. I have a 2 week old little girl who refuses to sleep in her bed or through the night. I am applying your tips ASAP
Hope this is helpful to you, Kasandra!
My baby is only 2 weeks, so I’m feeding her on demand, unless she’s gone 3 hours and then I wake her to nurse. My question is, when you are feeding on demand and the baby wakes up in the night do you still try to get them to be awake and play after nursing or just let them sleep?
During the night, they should go straight back to sleep and not play. 🙂
I’m wondering what I’m suppose to do in the beginning when they do wake up in the middle of the night wanting a bottle because they’re used to getting one? I follow all of these except he doesn’t have a bedtime routine. Maybe that’s what he’s missing.
If they wake up hungry, feed them, definitely. The idea is to fill up their bellies lots during the day and evening so that they will go longer without waking to eat. Maybe try a bedtime routine and even consider cluster feeding (feeding more frequently) during the four hours or so before bedtime.
Just saw this via Pintetest. We have done EVERYTHING the experts say regarding sleep. We’re at 6 months and still have sleep issues. There is no such thing as putting him down drowsy. As soon as he leaves Mommy’s arms, he’s screaming bloody murder! I too took offense to the part about praying. Since having my little one, I have prayed like I’ve never prayed before just so I could somehow help this guy learn how great sleep can be, yet nothing. Were my prayers not a good as yours? Prayer is an integral part of spiritual life, but to imply that it will help your baby sleep is just wrong.
Hi Alicia, I’m so sorry you’ve had such a challenging time getting your baby to sleep. I have had friends who, like you, tried everything and their sweet babies just weren’t good sleepers. Sometimes we can try everything and it still doesn’t work! In the part about prayer, I didn’t promise that God would help your baby sleep better, but I did say that He gives us wisdom in all matters including that of our baby’s sleep. I also mentioned how He gives us grace and strength in the midst of challenging seasons such as when our babies are not sleeping well. I hope that your baby begins to sleep better! *hugs*
I wish i would have found this when my first daughter was born!!! I sopiled her so much she slept on my chest for 3 months and then she slep in mine and my husbands bed until about a month ago (shes 2 and a half now). Now that we are expecting baby number 2 i will DEFINITELY try this. It was insane to get our first to restfuly sleep through the night. But i was a young new mom and didnt want to ask advice because i didnt want to seem incompatible. But anyways THANK YOU SO MUCH for this advice im going to try it with the next baby
You’re welcome, Emerald! Hope it helps your family this time around!
Hi! I love your blog! I have an 8 week old and have been following the babywise routine…but I just can’t figure out what a good set “bedtime” is a this point. What time was your evening nap when your baby was in this phase? What time was bedtime? Thanks!
At that age, we put the baby to bed around the time we wanted to go to bed (10:00-10:30?). That way, we could all benefit from that first stretch of (hopefully) longer sleep!
Thank you!! That is great to share however I’m just confused about sleeping through the night at 6 weeks, because my baby used to wake up screaming to nurse (I exclusivelye breastfeeded him).. Now I’m expecting baby no. 2 so do I feed at such times or is it wrong to feed at night because they learn the habit? I struggled with my baby now he’s 1 year old and He has just started to sleep through the night. And also with him I used to feed him on demand all the time and then after 6 months I felt he’s just waking up in the middle of the night out of habit not out of hunger. Advise?
As I read this, I love how important you made prayer in this! God has really blessed you, and this routine I plan and hope to try with my first child that will be due this year. Thank you for presenting your method! And of course giving God the glory is most important. I saw this article pinned on my Pinterest so I had to “like” and save for later.
Thanks so much for your sweet comment, Kristian!
Hi! So I have a couple of questions (I’m currently pregnant and trying To figure out what we’re going To do once out baby is born)
1. You say “feed on demand during The day” does that change at nightime?
2. You say “put The baby To nap various times a day. However, newborns sleep al day! Am I supposed To Wake my newborn every 2 hours?
Thanks so much for your help!
1. If your baby wakes in the night due to hunger, I always recommend feeding him/her.
2. Putting down for naps can start when the baby isn’t sleeping all day (6-8 weeks, depending on the baby). I woke my babies every 2-3 hours when they were less than a week old so I could feed them and get my milk supply strong (and get rid of their jaundice), but after that it’s not necessary. That said, if you want your baby to sleep longer at night, don’t let daytime naps go on too long (again, talking about babies that are a bit older).
Thanks for your advice! Just wondering what time you normally put the baby down for the night (for the hopefully longer sleep)…
Depends on the baby’s age, but we tried (in the early days) to do it around the same time we wanted to go to bed (10:00-10:30) so we could enjoy that longer stretch too. As time went on, we pushed it back earlier and earlier a little bit at a time.
so when you put your baby down while he’s still awake, did you use a pacifier?? My son is 5 weeks old and he’ll fight sleep till the bitter end! But the second I give him a pacifier he calms right down and his eyes are closed within 2 minutes.. Then once he’s almost asleep or fully asleep I’ll take the pacifier away without waking him up (hopefully)!
Putting him down while he’s still awake without it would never work for him!
Hi Bri, None of my kids would ever take a pacifier! That’s great that your son does… I’m sure that helps him fall asleep easily!
Hey.. your Tips are sounding amazing. I am definitely going to give these suggestion to one of my fast friend. she is in great need of this advices.
Hi! I just found out I am going to be a mom and people started telling me about getting on a schedule and stuff like this will happen! So I started looking around and found your blog! Great read , but I’m a little confused .If they take three naps a day when does the transition of sleeping all through the night by six weeks start? when do you start seeing them stay asleep longer at night?
Around six weeks I started to see a trend of sleeping around 6 hours. This increased to around 8 hours by 8 weeks.
This is such a great post! I have a 2 week old who was born at 36 weeks. When do you suggest starting this?
Congrats on your new little one! I would say to just watch where your baby is developmentally. You may find that you’ll want to start 4 weeks later than other moms would with full-term babies. Let your mommy instincts help guide you!
I know this post is old but I found it on Pintrest. Your nighttime routine is beautiful.
Thanks so much, Ashley!
hi,
I loved this post about sleep training. I have a question for you: my baby is two weeks old and I’m wondering if you do sleep, wake, eat in the middle of the night? It seems like a lot of work when I’m hardly getting any sleep as it is? At night my daughter nurses and sleeps from nursing.
Thanks for your help in advance!
In the middle of the night, I just feed my babies and put them straight back to bed! Sounds like you are doing that too!
Thank you for this post!! At nine weeks my daughter started sleeping through the night, pretty much 8 hours. I kept her on a good schedule during the day and always had a bedtime routine that included putting her in her crib while she was awake. She has an overbite that made it hard (and very painful for me!) for her to latch on. So after two months of the worst pain of my life I gave in and started bottle feeding her formula. (I cried the first few time I gave her a bottle.) You would not believe how many mothers have said to me the only reason she slept through the night is because formula keeps babies full longer. I’ve always had a way with babies and when it came to raising my own I had a good idea what I was doing. These mother’s would co-sleep with the boob basically right at their baby’s mouth and then wonder why they wouldn’t sleep through the night! Anyway, sorry to ramble. lol
My point is – it’s nice to read that a fellow mother, who breastfeed, was able to get her babies to sleep through at an early age. Thank you, thank you! =)
You go, mama! Thanks for your encouraging comment, Catie!
I found this blog very informative for caring baby’s need. New parents should read this post it guides them very well. keep sharing.. looking forward for more information
Hey there, did you put them down pretty early? When did your routine start every night?
Different depending on the age! We started at 9:00-9:30 early on but continued to push it back until baby was going to bed at 7:00.
Hi Aliesha,
Thank you so much for not only an informative post, and responding to all of these comments, but also for your sincerity, encouragement, and reminder to pray.
I feel like I did everything wrong with my first daughter when it came to sleeping so I was determined to read and research and attempt to do better this time around.
I have been doing everything in your post except putting her to sleep awake which I know is probably the biggest step! My second daughter is now 9 weeks old so I know I should probably start this step ASAP. Three questions:
1. If she does cry, which I have a feeling she will, what do you feel is a resoanable amount of time before I pick her up and aid her to sleep?
2. What do you suggest if they wake up from a nap before you know they are fully rested?
3. She typically has a 4 hour stretch when we first lay her down at night then it’s every two hours…I’m soooo tired! Any suggestions on how to make that extend?
Thank you in advance for any and all help!
Hi Jessica,
It sounds like you’re off to a great start!
1. Do what you feel comfortable with, but be conscious of the fact that just a couple of minutes of crying may seem like an eternity to you. Start small (5 minutes), and then maybe go longer if needed. When you do go in to console her, try rubbing her back and speaking calm words to her rather than pick her up.
2. I was told that if a baby wakes up screaming from a nap, they didn’t nap long enough. So I try to give my babies/kids a few minutes to fall back asleep. If they wake up early from a nap and aren’t screaming for a long time (I didn’t want to let them do that), they can just “play” in their crib for a few minutes.
3. Try making sure her last feeding before her long stretch is really good. If she’s super sleepy, try a bath to help wake her up before feeding her. Try all the things in this post (noise machine, bedtime routine, massage, etc.). The four hour stretch will eventually stretch out longer! When she wakes up at night, make sure she really is awake and needs you before getting up and feeding her. Sometimes babies wake up very briefly and fall right back to sleep without actually needing anything from you.
Enjoy that sweet new baby!
This is probably the best “sleeping babies” post I have ever read. I love how you encourage mamas to use a routine but also remind everyone to PAY ATTENTION TO THEIR BABIES, be patient, and feed them well! You are so gracious with all your responses to comments, too, even the snarky ones. 🙂
For what it’s worth, I did something very similar to this– sleep, eat, play– for my first and she slept great by the time she was two months old, only waking up once a night to nurse. Then she starting sleeping for 10-12 hrs straight once she was 10 months old. My second baby doesn’t like to sleep quite as much… she is six months old and wakes up 1-2 times to nurse, and only takes two naps a day. But I’m fine with that. She is huge, happy, and eats a ton, and I feel quite well rested despite waking up once or twice. I know she will sleep more when she is ready!
Thanks so much for your kind comment, Rebekah! I’m glad your babies have been such good sleepers! Sounds like you are a wonderful, attentive mama.
I have a 3.5 week old who is doing great at night wakes up once to feed and goes to bed very well. The last 4 days I haven’t been able to get her to nap during the day in her crib. I try the eat wake sleep but she eats is a wake and then wants to feed to go to sleep. It seems like she never fills herself up enough. She falls asleep I lay her down no rocking or anything because I didn’t do it before. She stays asleep for about 10 mins then wakes up and wants to eat again then we follow this whole cycle all day. Do you think it’s a growth spurt?
Hi Tara, It’s very common for babies to have a growth spurt around 4-6 weeks. It sounds like you’re doing a great job! Keep it up, and hopefully things will start to level out in the next few weeks.
what do you do when they get to the point that they are escaping the swaddle? my baby is almost 5 months, and he loves to be swaddled still, but does end up escaping some of the time now. i am worried about getting him to sleep through the night without it, although i haven’t tried yet. do you recommend using a weaning-type swaddle like zippadee-zip? (thank you so much for all your advice)
Aliesha, thank you for sharing your experience and encouraging us to pray first of all!
I really like the idea of implementing the eat, wake, sleep cycle and nursing on demand. I have an almost 2 week old and have been wondering how to do both of those things. It seems like if I nurse on demand then it messes up the eat, wake, sleep cycle because sometimes he’ll fall asleep during a feed, even though he didn’t finish eating and I’ll try to wake him up by burping or changing his diaper but he will still continue sleeping and then wake up half an hour later wanting to eat some more. It seems hard to follow the cycle because when they’re this young, they are still wanting to eat/sleep all the time. Do you have any advice about how to implement your ideas? Should I just tentatively try it now but maybe wait a couple weeks before I really start doing it? What do you usually do in those early weeks?
Hi Kate,
Sorry for the delay in reply… getting into the swing of things with my newborn!
When they’re this little, the main goal is to feed on demand and to put them down to bed when they are drowsy. My newest, Theodore, loves to eat, wait about 20 minutes, then eat on the other side. A little inefficient, but we do what works for his little tummy!
We often do eat, wake, eat, sleep. But the key is not nursing/eating to sleep. We always put our babies down to sleep when they are drowsy but not fully asleep.
You’ll gradually work into a schedule/routine. Don’t stress about it too much at this age!
Congrats again!
Thanks for these tips!
Aliesha,
Thank you so much for writing about your experience and for encouraging us to pray first of all!
I really like your idea for the eat, wake, sleep cycle and nursing on demand. But I’m finding it difficult to do both with my almost 2 week old. It seems like I either have to focus on one or the other. It could be that my son is just too young to really be able to implement this. So I was wondering if you have any advice or thoughts on how to implement the eat, wake, sleep routine as well as nurse on demand. Should I just tentatively try it out now but really get into it when he’s a bit older? What did you do in those early weeks when all they do is eat and sleep all the time? What happens most often these days is I feed him, play with him and put him down but then he starts rooting and crying so I nurse him and he falls asleep while I nurse. So then, in my mind, the cycle is messed up, but I am feeding on demand. I’d love any thoughts you have and things that worked for you! Thank you. 🙂
Oh, oops, I didn’t mean to post twice! I’m sorry. You can just respond to one of the posts 🙂 Thanks!
I’m still having a hard time healing from birth 10 days ago; my husband and I are taking four hour shifts at night. Would you recommend starting your routine after I’m healed?
Yes, definitely focus on your body healing right now! Sorry you’re having such a rough time… hope you start feeling back to normal soon!
How early did you put them in their own crib to fall asleep? But you didn’t let them cry it out that early did you? Around how long would you suggest that they need to be up for before they are tired enough to fall asleep on their own?
Everytime you laid them down awake?
Thanks for your help. I am trying to figure out baby number two for our family. It’s like a whole new learning game all over 🙂
Hi Katie, I’m right there in the thick of it too with our newest baby, Theodore! From the time we brought him home, we’ve tried to put him down in his crib awake. He has not cried it out… he’s instead gotten used to dozing off naturally on his own. There are times he cries, so we pick him right up (he’s not even two months yet). But most of the time he falls right to sleep on his own. We always turn the noise machine on for him. Blessings to you!
thanks Aleisha for sharing your tips, will definitely try it, As right now, I do feed on demand but often most feeding became “feed him to sleep”. Our current pattern is change-play (sometimes)-feed-sleep. No matter what I do, if he wakes up, he wants to be fed and he will eat until he dozes off. With your suggested pattern, should I wake him after feeding and put him back to sleep? My baby is only a week old, is it too soon to train him?
Since he’s only a week old, I wouldn’t start trying to put him on a schedule yet. He’ll be sleeping a lot right now! Eventually you’ll be able to put him to bed when he’s “milk drunk” drowsy but not 100% asleep. Congrats on your new addition!
Hi Aliesha, thank you so much for your article. It’s not only great info for how to help get Bub into a routine, but it has been invaluable to me in regards to my faith and hope. My Bub (yet to be born) is going through a hard time at the moment. I was ‘diagnosed’ with placental insufficiency a few weeks ago and was told that Bub will probably have to come early. My OB and the place where I get scanned are fantastic. I’m having scans and appointments weekly, so I feel well looked after.
Anyways, thank you again for providing this article. I hope and pray I will be able to use the information for a long time to come 😊
God bless xo
Thanks for your sweet comment, Selena! Blessings to you as you prepare to meet your little one!
I’ve been using eat, play, sleep with my baby from day 1 and it has worked great for us. She always preferred to be awake after eating so it was easy for us from the start. She is now almost 3 months (and 15 lbs!) and I’m back at work. At daycare she has been taking a long morning and afternoon nap, but our schedule has always been two shorter morning naps and a long afternoon nap. Was there a time/age when you moved away from this schedule? I’m wondering if I should talk to the daycare about trying to keep up with the eat, play, sleep, schedule. Or if I should just be a little more laid back and just let her fall into their morning/afternoon nap routine, as long as she is doing well. Eat, play, sleep has been working so well for us that I’m a little reluctant to let it go!
My baby is now 8 weeks and we haven’t had much luck with other methods. Is it too late to start using this routine?
Thank you for this post! I’m expecting baby number two soon and I’d love to be a bit more prepared to establish a routine this time around. Most of all, THANK YOU for being bold with your testimony! I found that prayer really is the best first step in any parenting choice, too!
Thank you for this post! I’m expecting baby number two soon and I’d love to be a bit more prepared to establish a routine this time around. Most of all, THANK YOU for being bold with your testimony! I found that prayer really is the best first step in any parenting choice, too!
I read so many posts like this in preparation for my little one, and in the first few weeks I felt like such a failure because the eat, play, sleep method didn’t work, and putting him down awake didn’t work. When I finally decided to do what worked (nursing him to sleep) things went way smoother. He’s 8 months now and sleeps pretty well. I just know how much new moms can feel like a failure when they read posts like this that are so contrary to what is actually working.
Maybe it’s because I didn’t pray… 😛
At what age did you start this routine? My newborn doesn’t seem to like the sleep sacks, do you recommend using them anyway and hope she’ll adjust? Do you follow this same routine at bedtime….what time is considered “bedtime” when the baby sleeps all day (she is two weeks old).
Thanks!
Do you swaddle your babies for nap time during the day, or just at night? My little one is 7 weeks old and not sleeping through the night, but we are working on it! She doesn’t like to be swaddles, but I’m wondering if I can “teach” it!
We swaddle for naps too.
Thank you for sharing! I’m not sure if you’re still replying to this, but my son is 8wks and insists on (screams bloody murder without) being held for all naps and at night. The above method is what I followed for my now 4yo daughter but this one isn’t having it! Also, despite best efforts to establish night and day, he is wide awake after his night time feeding following the bed time routine…any advice? I think I need to purchase Babywise. And definitely praying God continues to grace us all through this process!
Some babies are more difficult than others, as I’m sure you are realizing! Pray for wisdom. And it could be that in a few weeks, your new son may be more ready to get on a routine.
This is such a helpful post. I am expecting my first baby soon and I can’t wait to implement all these tips. I love that you remind us to look to God first. I am wondering- did you have your babies sleep in a bassinet in your own room in the beginning? I imagined my baby sleeping in a bassinet in our room at first, then transitioning to the crib in their own room. So I am wondering if I should acclimate them to their bassinet or crib at first?
Also, did you have anything for them to sleep in in the living room? Like the rock n play or a swing? I’m trying to decide if we need something like that or not because if I want the baby napping in its own bed, I may not need something in the living room to help it fall asleep?
Thanks for your help!
God bless you and your family 🙂
Hi Katie, Congratulations on your baby to be! Our babies have all slept in a small pack ‘n’ play or a rock ‘n’ play in our room for the first several months before transitioning to their rooms. (See specifics on products we like in this post: http://www.feathersinournest.com/2015/10/baby-basics-guide-to-the-products-i-love.html) We used the rock ‘n’ play and a few other baby papasan type things (depending on which baby). Some babies really like a swing. Maybe you could borrow one from a friend to see if it’s something your baby likes and you’ll use!
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How soon did you start this routine? My baby is a month old and I am considering starting a routine with him. Have you even done the cry it out method? Or is this simply all you do and they sleep through the night? Thanks! 🙂
Where did your babes sleep during the night, when you first brought them home?
In our bedroom in a Pack ‘n’ Play or Rock ‘n’ Play.
Hello. My first baby has never fallen asleep on her own, except for a few car rides after she cried it out. She is 6 weeks old now and still feel she is too young to start the CIO method. She’s only rarely slept more than 4 hrs at a time at night and has a very hard time staying asleep in the day. Is 6 weeks really too early to start CIO? of course she will eat at night if she’s hungry, hut would I let her CIO during every sleep period ? Naps, nighttime, etc? Thank you!
Congrats on your new little one! As I stated several times in this post, we don’t let our babies cry it out. Aim for getting her to fall asleep on her own (drowsy, “milk drunk,” etc.) for naps first, then at night time.
Hi, I am a new mom and I want to teach our boy to sleep through the night by 6-7 weeks. He is 3 weeks now and I am not sure where to start. I do swaddle him at night but not during a day. He wakes up every two hours to eat and I have no idea where I can start. He sleeps a lot during a day. I have hard time keeping him awake when I feed him. He just falls asleep by eating. So when will be the right time to start teaching him to stick to the schedule? I feel like he is so little but don’t want to wait a long time.
Thank you!
Thank you for your post it’s super encouraging. I have friends that did babywise to the tee right from the start which included never feeding If it wasn’t during a scheduled time. My sweet baby boy is three weeks old and is becoming more and more difficult to put to sleep. He pretty much is on a eat play sleep schedule during the day but his fussy time is from 7-10pm when he acts like he wants to eat for hours so I let him and then he sleeps for almost four hours after that. Did you ever come accross this? I’m afraid I will start a bad habit but I know cluster feeding is a really thing. Also I read that your first child you let CIO when she was 3 months. What was your method? I want to wait a little longer before I do that. My family held him all the time in the beginning so that’s all he wants now! So I bounce and sway him to sleep every time he goes down and sometimes it’s easier than others! So I think I will do CIO closer to 3 months and curious to know how you did that. Also do you eventually get on a feeding schedule? Thank you!
I don’t get it… I’ve been following these directions and babywise etc, but none of them works on neither my boy or my new baby girl. (although, she does sleep longer and more frequently than her brother did)
I definitely do the nursing on demand! I thought that was just second nature though. Lol. The problem I have is that my baby girl loves sleeping during the day and even if you do the “don’t let them sleep for too long” thing, she’d get overtired and will not sleep well during that night. Trying to lay her down while awake backfired too, the more I kept going with the routine (even with my super lack of sleep, because I really want to achieve what everyone else had on here lol) it just got worse and worse… Like concerningly worse.
Finally, I took her to the doctor for a check up and it turned out that she lost weight cause of the routine… I felt awful and like a horrible parent… I should’ve stopped when I saw it wasn’t working, but I thought it just took up until the 6th week to get results. Don’t worry, I’m not blaming you at all! It’s my fault as a mother.
But I guess I’m one of the few that this didn’t work for, which is just as God intended, so all’s well. This DID, however, work wonders for my friend!! So we are truly grateful for your posts! Thank you for all that you’ve taken time to write! You really helped many!
Hi Sawyer, I’m so sorry you’ve had such a rough start with your baby girl! I hope that with the help of your pediatrician and other wise people in your life, you’ll be able to find a way that works for your child and your family. Every baby is so different. I hope this post didn’t discourage you at all, and I hope you know I think you’re doing an amazing job as a mom!! Blessings to you!
All babies are different.. Find what works for both mum & Bub.
One thing I do believe in is the window.. Learn to read it, also learn to read the cry. Both these are a way Bub communicates.
Thanks, Kaz!
I have a question 🙂 my baby girl is 5 weeks and we’ve been having trouble with her sleeping through the night and staying asleep. She loves the paci but when going to sleep, it would fall out and she would cry and we’d have to get up and put it back in for her to stop crying and we would have to do that for an average of 10 times before she was so tired that when the paci fell out, she didn’t care. I’ve been trying to have her sleep without the paci both at night and during naps. When she finally stops crying and falls asleep, I noticed that she only naps for 30-40 mins and then wakes up. Before, she was able to nap for 1.5-2 hours. Do you have any idea why her naps are cut short now? Thanks so much!
It could just be her age! Babies sleep a TON when they’re first born, but as they grow, they’ll be alert and awake more and more during the day. Maybe try scheduling 3-4 shorter naps a day. Enjoy that sweet new little one!
Hi, thank you for this post, it is helpful. My baby is 8 weeks old and is still waking up every two hours (shorter as we approach the morning ) to nurse. He eats for about 5-10 mins each time. He has literally gained a oh a week since birth so that isn’t an issue and I feed on demand during the day. How do I know if he is just San king or getting full feedings? I feel like he should need to eat so often at night but each time he wake up he is rooting bigiime. If I am lucky I get a three hour stretch when he first goes to sleep. For the most part I follow eat/play/sleep or eat/play/eat/sleep and lay him down awake. He isn’t a great napper either, usually 45 mins to an hour but he will take several through the day. Sometimes I spend the whole day just trying to get him to nap, especially if we go out and the day is disturbed. Any advice you can provide is appreciated. I have a couple months before returning to work so I am hoping to gently help my baby sleep through the night by then.
Sorry for the typos. I mean to say he has gained a lb a week since birth (he is at least 15lbs at 8 weeks, big boy lol). And I meant to ask how do I know if he is snacking vs getting a full feeding. Thanks again.
Hello! Thank you for sharing your post and experience! I have a 4.5 week old and I’m going crazy with his sleep patterns. According to The Wonder Weeks he’s going through a leap–wants to be held and nursed and is fussy most of the day and night. I have a difficult time following your patterns with his behaviors like this. Did you find yourself holding your babies more through this period or still lying then down? As soon as we try to lie him down he screams or he’s wide awake a lot of the day. Thank you for your help!
Hi JoAnne,
Sounds like your baby needs extra love and cuddles at this age and stage! Hold him and nurse him lots… that’s exactly what he needs! Once he’s no longer in this fussy phase, you can try again laying him down when he’s awake. You’re doing a great job, mama!
Hello, I’m not quite sure why I’m reading this post and all these comments since my “babies” are in their 40’s now and I have teenage and 23 year old grandchildren! I came to your blog to read the Aldi’s post (great) by way of Pinterest then saw the post about babies sleeping through the night. It really pains me to hear stories all the time about how people’s children wake them up at 5:00 a.m or won’t go to bed till the parents do, etc. etc. I know freedom of everything in child raising is more prevalent now–but I truly believe that the biggest thing babies and children need, other than love of course, is ROUTINE. They need regular mealtimes (after newborn), regular play especially outside, a bedtime routine and in general things to be on schedule. These busy days it’s not always as easy as it used to be–I was lucky to be home while my kids were little, but everyone needs to keep the best routines they can.
Anyway, I’m jumping in here to commend you and most of the commenting moms for setting up routines that serve their babies’ needs and their own needs and giving kids the gift of trouble free eating and sleeping. My babies were small–6,5 and 6,8 though now my son is 6,6–ha ha–but they still slept through the night at 6-8 weeks and I mean all night. They slept from 8 p.m. till 8 a.m. until school time came and they had to be woken for school. Both took a mid morning nap and an afternoon nap till they were about 2-3 and then just one long afternoon nap until they went to Kindergarten. They slept like that all through their childhood and still don’t have issues. We had our nights of teething and some ill ones, but never a regular thing of it and we didn’t go through the 37 requests once in bed for the night either. They had dinner, some quiet playtime, a bath, were read to, went to the bathroom, got a drink and that was it. They knew the routine and were asleep in 10 minutes, or less. But, they were tired out too as they went out in all but the worst weather. Again, newborns aren’t able to do that but you have to start then with the routines.
The key is starting early, not overlooking the babies’ and kids’ needs, but paying attention to your needs too. A busy mom NEEDS the baby’s nap as much as he does! You do this by not tiptoeing around the baby–right from the start do the vacuuming, play the radio, have the TV on. They learn to sleep through it. My kids got tired around 10 a.m. and were put in their crib for about an hour. They played and had lunch about 1:00, got their faces washed, shoes and socks off, diaper changed if that early and then they knew it was nap time. When they got old enough to say, “I don’t want to nap.” I told them they just needed to rest and could look at a book or toy and once pressure was taken off–they dozed off. As far as mornings–if you have one that gets up at 5:00 a.m. you take them back to bed and tell them it’s still night time. Later on, set them up a signal such as daylight, a clock face with a green colored area at 7 or whenever, and they even sell gadgets that will show that it’s an o.k. time to get up. Otherwise, they are to stay in bed and try to go back to sleep or play in bed with something quiet. Of course, newborns are different but you start from the beginning with everything you can do to encourage good sleep habits, or at least as soon as you find you need to. This is not mistreating them, it’s helping them for their entire lives.
Food the same way–I didn’t nurse and we started food much earlier in those days, but whenever you start it, you start with the cereals of course to make sure they tolerate them–then veggies next then fruit so they don’t get the sweet stuff first. Feed them ALL the kinds of foods, even if you don’t prefer them. They’ll make their own choices believe me–I still remember strained peas running out of my daughter’s mouth though she loved regular peas a little later. Have regular meal times for them and feed them the best food you can. No one in our family–kids or grandkids are fussy eaters or poor sleepers, but I only had two and only have 4 grandchildren so there always could be the odd one.
Parents need to give their children as much routine as possible with their own particular lifestyle. If they have to go to daycare, then find one that has set rest times and etc. And–they need outdoor time and fresh air, even little babies when weather permits. I know so many little kids who never play outside–only on their electronics or staring at the TV, and then parents wonder why they’re not tired enough to sleep.
So congratulations on the lessons you are trying to provide, Aliesha, and disregard the complainers–you’re doing the right thing! In the end all parents need to remember that it is THEY that are in charge and training (so to speak) of the children, not the children training them! Sorry for the rant but’s it so frustrating when parents create their own children’s issues and then complain about them! I was a middle school/high school secretary for 27 years until I retired, so I’ve seen it all! Thanks!
PS If anyone wants to write and complain about the things I’ve written–that’s fine…I have a family full of good people with good habits and responsibility levels–so proud of them! They can look up the Golden Rule if they don’t know what it is, and should, as it’s still an excellent way to teach children.
I really do think that teaching babies to fall asleep on their own is life changing! I sleep trained my second daughter when she was 3 mo and it changed her life and our life as parents. She started to nap longer, she was able to fall asleep on her own without crying. It just must be the right method. I think the best one is by Susan Urban. The method is without CIO so no harm for the baby. I’ve read her guide in an hour or so because it’s in a nutshell and i knew exactly what to do with step by step instructions. After 3 days my LO was able to sleep all night long without eating every hour and she started to nap longer so she finally wasn’t exhausted. The method must be great because I had like the worst sleeper in the history of babies.
You just must do it step-by-step like the author says. So I wanted to encourage everybody who is interested in sleep train a baby to first of all try Susan Urban’s method and follow her instructions and I bet any other method especially with CIO won’t be necessary. I’ve found instructions on what to do and how to do it in the guide “How to teach a baby to fall asleep alone” from I think the author’s website http://www.parental-love.com
I just regret I didn’t sleep train my older son with this method but I can’t turn back the time can I